New Year, New Experiences, New Failures

January 27th- Our break was super fun. We spent lots of time with Debbie now that she is RETIRED! We got to see Jenny's kids and went sledding with Hannah. My ring got caught in a glove and one of the side diamonds came off. I found it and got it fixed but almost had a heart attack. Our New Years Eve was spent at the Busby's playing cards all night. It was quite enjoyable.

Well my teaching job started and I learned a lot from it. I ended up resigning after a week of transition. I should never have taken on something that made me feel 95% scared and intimidated and only 5% excited and challenged. Yeah... I just should not have ignored the insecurities I felt about the whole thing. All the things that made me feel uncomfortable about signing the contract were the things that made me resign.

What I did not like: I did not enjoy disciplining children all day and teaching math sucks (especially since it is the first time they have learned this stuff). People take courses on how to teach this stuff and I have only taught secondary, plus math sucks. No one warned me about how totally different it is to teach this level (except for the 1 day I came and observed). There are so many undiagnosed ADHD kids and I could not just teach for 5 minutes straight. I hated having to move from classroom to activities to recess and lunch, while walking them to these places and trying to keep them quiet and under control. I had no idea that my personality got fed up with doing this all day. I think it is not too bad when you are a good teacher with experience, but it was made worse by speaking to them only in French. It was too hard to get them to understand or for me to gain control, especially with my lack of experience. I do not understand the grading system or organization of work in elementary school. My co-teacher was a bit too abrasive for me and I had no idea how to use the aide in the classroom (she was wierd too). It was all just sooo exhausting and I was constantly having to discipline which annoys me to death (recess duty is just telling kids not to break rules). Overall, the age and curriculum did not fit me. This is not want I want to do for the rest of my life and I have an opportunity to substitute for Junior High French classes, which makes me super excited! That is what I want to do.

What I did like: Teaching literacy was fun because I was actually teaching them how to read French, granted it was hard because it was coupled with learning how to read letters anyway in English. I loved that they picked up on French through hearing it constantly. Their minds were like sponges. It showed me that I really can teach through speaking French a lot. The kids were adorable when they spoke French to me. I got cute kid art daily. I had this cool piece of technology called a document camera which displays any thing onto a projector (so like marbles on paper that you can move around and interact with so they can see better. I also loved having my own classroom with my name on it.

Every night when I came home, I was so depressed and had multiple breakdowns. I never felt like this when I student taught. I should be excited, a little bit nervous, but confident. I hated going to work (which was an hour drive in winter snow, which I LOVE). When I resigned I told the principal that I needed to do what made me happy. It was super hard to get the guts to admit I had made a mistake in taking the job.

A week after I resigned, I got a letter in the mail saying that I owed the district $1000 for resigning before giving 30 days notice. I was soo mad and soo sad. I hardly earned $1000 working there. My principal never mentioned that option and she assumed it was for ASAP. I figured it was fine since they found a replacement. I had never had a contracte djob like that before so I didn't realize I had to check that stuff. If I don't pay the fine then I cannot be rehired in that district. That happens to be the same district that I plan on long-term substituting. Now I have to find an extra $1000 dollars, no biggy. It's not like we are poor, need to pay off our credit card from the year I haven't been working, or like I don't have a current job. Taking the job actually added to our debt. Great dilemma I got myself into. Welcome to the real world miss college graduate.

So I had a horrible experience with my first real job. I am going to pay the fine and move forward withthe future. Wait, but I don't have a steady job, still can't get affordable health insurance, and have nothing to do until subbing in Provo starts. This was scarring but I needed to learn some things I guess.

I am so scared about making money and working now. I have been reading a lot of spiritually stregthening books and have decided to put faith in God that we will be blessed and things will work out. How are we going to pay $1000 dollars? Well, my parents are going to pay it and we can eventually pay them back. Time is important because I have to be ready to substitute for the pregnant French teacher whenever she has her baby. Being unblacklisted from the district takes some time and the teacher is due in a couple of weeks. I am so grateful to my parents for their willingness to help us. I am trying to make things happen instead of sitting here sulking (which I am pretty excellent at doing). It has been a really good experience for me to plea with my Heavenly Father for comfort and guidance. I feel like I pray to him so much right now. It is true that we tend to go to him more when we are in distress. I will remember him when things are going well too. He is in charge of all and I know he wants me to be happy. He is aware of my circumstances and is watching over me.

Our Anniversary and Christmas

Dec. 26th- It was our anniversary weekend last weekend and Debbie set us up for one night at the Hotel Park City. We had a huge cabin with a living room, kitchen, and our own jacuzzi on the patio (the best part). We walked down Main Street and ate at this really expensive restaurant. It was so beautiful to sit in the hot tub and watch the snow fall outside. It was absolutely amazing! Our Christmas was modest and fun. I received a scarf and beanie and nail polish. I got Andrew a Beatles book of music so he could play the guitar music to any of the songs. I did a scavenger hunt like our family does. It gave him clues to places around the apartment. At the end there was a handsome scarf for him. It was a beautiful first "White Christmas".

A Job Right Out Of College

Dec. 23rd- Since finishing school I have been worried about getting enough substituting jobs in Provo while waiting for my French teaching job to come around in mid February. One day I came upon a 2nd grade French dual immersion teaching opportunity in West Valley starting in January. I felt like it was a way to keep busy and seemed like a fun challenge. Dual immersion is where they teach kids math, social studies, and science in French and then teach French literacy. I applied for the job because it would be nice to start working now. I had my first real job interview with 4 people interviewing me. Nerve wracking. I guess I impressed them because they offered me the job 6 days later. I was really on the fence about it because this is not what I am trained for. I don't know if I'll like teaching math, and I know nothing about teaching kids stuff they have never learned before, and then in French. I was really confused and agonizing about the decision. After praying about it, I got the answer that I should do whatever I want. I was convinced by the principal that I would have support the whole way through and I felt that I could do it. I am still really scared because it is not my element. It is an impressive job to take on. I'm gonna be a big girl.

Christmas Decorations

Dec. 7th- We decide not to travel this Christmas and instead have our own real family Christmas. We bought a Christmas tree last night and decorated it with ornaments and also decorated our apartment with lights, mistletoe, and nativity sets. Our first Christmas not on our honeymoon! Our anniversary is coming up too! Almost one year. Andrew has it planned out. The other day, along with some other contributors, he bought me a gorgeous Banana Republic coat for the winter. It makes it so that I actually want to go outside and get dressed for winter. Andrew also applied for the Graphic Design program and fins out soon if he got in. They definitely don't let everyone in. I'm almost positive they will accept him. He's too talented.

Arizona In The Winter Is Nice, Utah= Bad

Nov. 30th- Our Thanksgiving weekend was so fun and so scary. We drove down to Mesa to visit Joy and Quin's family. Note to self, don't drive for 10 hours straight starting at 5 pm. We read Hunger Games, ate yummy food, sang songs, watched movies, visited Andrew's dad's grave, went repelling off a 60 ft cliff, and visited the lights on the Mesa Temple Square. It was wonderful to be with my family since that doesn't get to happen often.

The drive back was horrifying. The last day of student teaching was really icy and I slid off the road. My first time and it scared the poop out of me. Our car has rear wheel drive and our tires are made for racing. There isn't a good grip on them. Our drive back contained two more slides off the road. The first one ended in people stopping to help us out just like when I slid off on my way to the school. After we got back on the road I was paralyzed with fear. I couldn't stop crying because I did not want to die driving in a canyon. It was pretty okay weather until it got dark and we hit a patch of ice in Panguitch. Our car was completely stuck and we had to call a tow truck. We decided to stay in a motel over night and finish the last three hours the next day after the sun melted some of the ice. I was a wreck to say the least. The day after we arrived safely home, we had to make some repairs to our car since it had a bit of damage from the slides. We also had all weather tires put on. They make me feel much safer in the winter weather. I want a huge Jeep right now. No one told me my car would be a problem out here. I also never got trained in how to drive in the snow and ice. I hate Utah winters. I will not be sad to leave this place. I will visit and when I do, I will have a huge all wheel drive tank!

Student Teaching Comes To A Close

Nov. 23rd- Student teaching has come to an end. My last days were parties where we watched some French related videos and some girls gave me nice notes. They were such great kids. I am going to miss the routine and the interaction with them, but it's okay because I will move on to new students and get to create new relationships. All I have left is some ESL stuff and my huge Teacher Work Sample which is a 20 page analysis of a unit I taught my French 2 class. Then I am sooo done with college!!!!! $25, 000 in tuition and many wonderful growth experiences and hard work have profited me a degree in French Teaching and a mionor in TESOL. Who would have imagined that outcome 6, 4, or even 2 years ago. Life can change so quickly. I will be among the elite who can say they have a college degree. It really is quite an accomplishment even though I grew up expecting no less of myself.

Zombies and Unicorns

Nov. 1st- Halloween was fun because we each had two different costumes and went to a couple of parties. Our first party was the ward one at a cabin up in Sundance. Everyone wore couple costumes except for Andrew and I. I was a unicorn and Andrew was a Zombie. We definitely bought some makeup for the occasion. It was the best halloween party I have ever been to. Some couples slept over and we played "Smurf" and watched "Hocus Pocus." There was a lovely pancake breakfast and a gorgeous view of the snow capped mountains. The rest of the day was filled with "scary" movies, namely "Bewitched", "Batman Returns" and "Edward Scissorhands." That night we went to a party hosted by Jes and Kirby. I was a punk rocker and Andrew was a rapper with an old boombox (he even had thin facial hair to accompany his outfit). We needed that quality time and fun together. I am so lucky to have a husband who is so sensitive and cares so much about our relationship. He treats me like a princess and I am so happy that I am cherished by him.

"The Quail", Yeah Not As Pretty As "La Caille"

Nov. 1st- Andrew and I went to La Caille with the French program. It is a super chic, expensive French restaurant. Food was excellent and we ate escargot. I will never eat Bananas Foster because they put some kind of alcohol on it and then burned it away but it still tasted like nail polish remover. The out side was gorgeous and picturesque. My mentor teacher Charlotte is the one in the middle of the above picture.

We just ended the first term and I entered grades and everythinG. I only have 3 more weeks left! Both Andrew and I have been so busy working hard on our careers. We are at such a critical point where we are learning how everything works. It demands a lot of time and concentration. It's been a little bit hard to connect since our time is more limited. We are trying to adjust and give more attention and love. I hate that Andrew has night classes because I get home at about 4 and then I'm free and he's not always free.

Sisters in Town

Oct. 17th- Last week Erin and Jenny were in town so we had nonstop plans with them. The whole family of adults did an endowment session in Salt Lake and then ate Greek food. Erin had a smashing party in the back yard and Andrew and I made an interesting present for her. It involved a photoshopped picture of Erin's dream man (a sailor) and then surrounding him with crazy trinkets that were probably a part of his life. Wierd in know but different. Her party was so cool. The back porch was turned into a live music venue. The food was delicious and the decorations included colorful couches, old tvs, poloroids, colorful lights and an all around vintage feel. There was live music too.

Andrew played the piano and guitar at the "Education In Zion" exhibit on campus. Some gut tipped him 10 dollars for making his day better.

Yesterday started out innocently by going to the BYU Lost and Found sale where we found some great steals. It turned into lunch at Red Lobster and a crazy shopping spree. It was nice to have fun and buy new things instead of feeling poor and boring. I'm glad my husband loves shopping and knows what looks good on me. It was so relaxing and fun.

Playing Dress Up

Oct. 4th- Recently Andrew and I got to dress up like a Prince and a Princess for a little girl party. Our friend Janae asked us too. We just sang the Princess song and talked about what a princess does. The girls took pictures with us. Meredith did my makeup which looked hott and she took pix.

I had Parent Teacher Conferences for two days and didn't get home until 9. I had to write a paper before midnight too. Didn't see Andrew much. He shaved his hair and I no like that much.

Conference weekend was super. We went to Andrew's mission reunion where we ate Philly Cheesesteaks and I met his 2nd mission prez who he served as AP with for the most part.

I Found A Career

Sept. 23rd- I have noticed that I feel happier since I started teaching. I think it helps me to have a goal and purpose in my life so that I am busy learning and growing. I got great feedback from my first observation. I think I am meant to do this teaching stuff. It is soo hard yet so rewarding. Yesterday the French Club did a service activity helping a pregnant Swiss woman. Everything was in French. We ate quiche and Salade Nicoise and cleaned her house. She had an adorable 3 yr. old daughter who spoke both English and French and she was so adorable. Little kids who speak another language are too cute. As I was driving home I became overwhelmed with joy because I was so grateful that God helped me find something I love, that I'm good at, and that helps me make a drifference in someone's life.



Over Labor day weekend we had a 12 hour Star Wars marathon and watched all 6. Meredtih and Debra wer the only ones who watched them all with us. Others joined in occasionally. We recorded different music from the movies with our mouths.

We went to this awesome open mic night thrown by Ben Isaacs. So fun! They handed out percussions for the audience to play. It was so lively and the audience was so engaged.

Last Saturday we went tubing down the Provo River with our ward. Best tubing I've ever done. No seaweed, clear water, and the mountains were beautiful.

We attended the Homecoming dance at Copperhills. We danced the night away and Andrew impressed me with his sweet moves.

I found out that I can take a long-term substituting job for a French teacher who is pregnant. It is at a Junior High in Holladay. It is a great step before getting my own classroom since I am the real teacher but don't get to plan the lessons. I can tweek them though. Oh and I get paid!

Life is really good right now. I love learning how to be a better teacher, I'll soon be making money, and I get to hang out with teenagers a lot. I don't like getting up at 5:45 am and driving an hour to get to school every day. Kinda rough but worth it.

Let the Teaching Commence

Sept. 2nd- I started my Student Teaching at Copperhills High School in West Jordan and it is going soooooo well. I love my mentor teacher Charlotte Vanwagenen. She told me that she asked for the best becuase she is pretty protective and Dr. Erickson gave her me. She is young and gives me license to explore and change things. She is super helpful and thinks I'm fantastic. Her positive energy really helps me make things more lively and sets up a great lead to follow. I am scared about making mistakes and I'm not sure yet if I'm good at this or if I'll actually like it. I haven't started teaching yet so we'll see. I found a girl to carpool with, Denise. She teaches Math and I hope we will get along because we will be driving together for 2 hours everyday.

Andrew got a job doing graphic design for BYU Chinese Flagship. Yay for more of an income!

Visit with Mom in Florida

Aug. 23- I went to Florida for about 5 days to help Mom. She needed emotional support and love during her recovery. This was the first time Andrew and I have been apart since my last trip to Florida a year and a half ago. The trip opened my eyes to some things and I saw that it can be difficult interacting with Mom right now. Her life is really hard right now and she is going through a lot. I feel like there has been a big change in her personality and I hope we can figure out what is going on. I just want to continue loving her and giving her support because I know that she is such a wonderful person who is dealing with some hard things.

Andrew brought me Sushi when he picked me up from the airport. I told him to bring that to me whenever he has the urge to get me flowers. So cute!

Summer Activities

Aug. 16th- We attended a lovely going away party for Cassi and Drew. We also went to an Imagine Dragons concert with Meredith. KC Brown got married and we went to his reception which was really well decorated. Kim and Rob graced us with a game of Boggle. Rock Canyon Park showed "Penelope" on a huge screen. We helped Debra decorate her new classroom with science stuff like butterflies, clouds, UFOs, planets. Recently we invited the Fehlbergs over for dinner and a game. We feel they could become great friends.

Breast Cancer Awareness

Aug. 4th- My mom had breast cancer and had a mastectomy. Pretty serious stuff. I can't believe she keeps having such extreme health issues. She is doing okay right now.

Meredith has her own car right now so we don't have to help her get around anymore. Right now I'm a bum with nothing to do until student teaching starts. I hate being poor and unproductive with no job to help either of those problems.

Andrew's new name for his freelance job is VADA Creative Studio. I love it! He focuses on learning how to be better all the time. He studies design on his own and doew it all the time. I think that's the best way to get better.

Sometimes You Can Get Appendicitus

July 17th- Andrew had really bad stomach pains again and after getting a blessing from Jeff, we went to the ER. After 5 hours, an ultrasound and CAT scan, the result was Appendicitus. He had surgery 4 hours later. It was crazy quick and way expensive.

The surgery went well and we had fun lounging around the hospital, eating food, and spending time together. I'm glad I could be right by his side the whole time. Andrew has only his freelance to work on these days so he was able to keep working through the recovery. I like taking care of him but it was really scary to see him in such extreme pain. I'm so grateful that we were told in his blessing to seek medical attention.

A Wedding In The Temple

July 13th- Our wonderful cousin Summer had a missionary farewll at Bombay House. She will be greatly missed.

Our friend Janae was married in the Draper temple and it was so wonderful to be a part of that special sealing ceremony again. It was wonderful to see that she is happy and to remember the eternal covenants Andrew and I made. I loved feeling the feelings from our wedding day all over. It is such a great knowledge to know that our marriage is so strongly united with God. The temple is such a beautiful place of instruction and truth.

Atlanta Lovin'

July 6th- Our 4th of July celebration was in Atlanta this year. We started in Helen, GA (a German Swiss tourist town) with the family. We stayed in agorgeous cabin in the rolling Appalachian Mountains. We did some really fun activities with the peeps. We went to a waterpark, went floating down the Chatahoochee. Andrew flipped over and it was hilarious. We laughed our heads off playing Balderdash and hearing the definition of "nubbin". Andrew and I were having some problems during the trip and they were eventually resolved after some crying. The problems are still under construction but we finally are more aware of them. It was great for all the extended family to meet Andrew and this was a wonderful vacation from daily life.

Taking A Break From Creativity To Do Something Else Creative

Monday June 28- We had a picnic with Aurora and Ben before she left for Nauvoo. That is such a cool experience. Now that Andrew is focusing on Mindcloud he has been able to make a lot of progress and is working really hard (except that it isn't work because it is so fun for him.) His creative thoughts are never ending. He gets up and goes straight to the Mac to design. The other day he took a break and went and wrote a song. That perfectly describes him. I informed him that it is not a break when he goes and does something else that gets his creative juices flowing.

We played soccer Friday and as usual came home with bruises and sore muscles. We watched I Heart Huckabees with Mandy and talked to her about her life. I'm glad we are friends and get to be related. Vive le Kool Kids Klub, oops, I mean Cool Kids Club.

Quitting Pirateland and Looking Toward Design

Saturday June 19- Last week we babysat the Beck girls. The next night Andrew came home from work very upset. He ended up quitting his job at PI because of some people that made it a bad working environment. He is actually working on getting them fired. He was not making as much money as we thought he would and he doesn't strive to be a server all his life. He is applying to new jobs that have to do with design and is now focusing on Mindcloud. I am glad he can focus on something that really makes him happy and that he is in control of. He is working so hard and I want him to have success so that he can have more hope for his future as a provider and working man. He is so talented and he's a real go-getter that I think he should get benefits from his hard work.

We went camping down in Manti this weekend. We were with our ward and watched the outdated and sadly a bit cheesy Miracle Pageant. We told embarrassing stories around the fire and slept on the hard ground. We ate a good breakfast and then did a live endowment session. It was neat to be able to move to the different rooms. I almost liked it better. The temple was so gorgeous and old. The inside was decorated so elegantly in a 19th century way.

I attended Shanda's bridal shower at a cute Bistro. We had tea, scones, finger sandwiches and cookies for our high-tea party. It was a refined get together and Shanda loved it. Andrew designed the beautiful, girlie invitations. I am so glad that she is getting married and life will be on its way to proving that all her doubts about marriage and love were wrong. She did find someone who loves her and she will be stable and happy.

Don't Eat Too Many Donuts

June 10- We attended Andrew's High School reunion at a park and played with some buddies. Everyone was married with babies. Crazy, especially since these girls are 23. We watched "What's Up Doc" at Adam's house and Andrew ate way too much junk food. He threw up all morning and I was able to take care of him. It breaks my heart to see him in pain and to not be in control of making it all better. I got a little nauseous but we were finally all better by Tuesday.

I played soccer with the French Camp students and accidently met the French teacher who will mentor me for student teaching. She was young and very enjoyable. I think we will get along very well and I am more excited about it.

I took care of Meredith because she got her wisdom teeth removal surgery. I like taking care of people and I think that will help me to be a good mom.

I love my husband. He works so hard and he loves me so hard. We went to Costa Vida after I logged and captured some home videos that I am turning into DVDs. We sat on a blanket and looked at the stars at Rock Canyon. It brought us back to the old days. We don't really go on dates and it was nice to et out of our usual routine. Someday we will be able to do that more often and actually spend money.

Josh and Candie's family is moving to Gainesville at the end of the month. That is so great that Josh will go back to the school and they are humble enough to kind of start over again. They will be living with Mom and Dadda.

Andrew's Magical Birthday Party

Friday May 28- We celebrated Andrew's birthday last Saturday with a Childhood Imagination Party. Andrew loved it! All of his close friends came and we dressed up like kids, me in pigtails and my onesie. We ate macaroni and cheese with hotdogs, graham crackers and milk, Fruity Pebbles, Lucky Charms, and root beer floats. We played Candyland, told childhood memories, watched ninja turtles and played drawing games. The apt was decorated with kids books, stuffed animals, pictures, drawings, and figurines. Throwing a party meant a lot to Andrew and I was so glad he could play with his friends. Rob and Kim spent the night for our first ever couples sleepover. We read a bedtime story and made pancakes for breakfast and shared couple timelines of dating and love. That night we had a wonderful birthday dinner at Debbie's and played a fun card game. It was great to get to know Rob and Kim who are living nearby for the summer while they go to BYU.

In watching some of our old movies from the library we saw the Paris or French was always in older films. I guess it was the cool thing back them. Andrew is growing out his hair and I am excited to see what happens.

Florida Wedding

Wednesday May 19-Last week we were busy getting ready to leave for Florida. We borrowed a friend's camera and left Thursday. We traveled all day with Meredith and ate dinner with Mom and Dad. Meredith married Andrew and I under a Tiki hut on the beach like we had always dreamed about. Friday we finally went to Uncle Chet's where Andrew met Gpa John and Gma Karen. We hung out with Adrian and Lindsay and they loved Andrew. They are so fun and silly.

The day of the wedding Josh and Laura were there and we all got dressed up and were lookin hott. The wedding was on a beach but it wasn't private. There were lots of people and sometimes shots of people's butt cracks were in the shots. Lots of people dressed casual with button up Florida shirts. It was a Catholic and LDS mixed wedding and Dad married them after talking about the powers to bind on earth and in heaven as we believe. There was a Catholic coin ceremony and a blessing given to them from Joe. Andrew filmed it all and I am excited to see the finished product someday. We went to the reception and partied. I was feeling bad for the bride and groom by the end of the evening. I remember how tiring it is and wanting to just be done with everything and alone. We saw them off and I was glad to see them so genuinely happy. It will be wonderful when they are able to be sealed in the temple.

Sometimes We Eat Pancake/American Cheese Sandwiches

Monday May 10- We learned that life without Andrew's brain meds is not ideal. I never knew how necessary they were. We are both taking classes for the spring term. I hate TELL classes and he is taking some GEs. Andrew bought a real videographer camera from Ebay and he was sooo excited but then we found out it has need of an expensive repair. We have to either fix the problem or find another high quality camera before we leave for Florida to film Vivi's wedding. Agggh!

So we got through the last couple of days of April on Pancake and American Cheese sandwiches and cereal (we felt really pathetic and had to laugh) until Debbie gave us some food out of the blue. It was such a blessing and it is always good to pay your tithing.

We got callings in our ward. Andrew is the ward chorister and I am choir president. I will teach a choir basics class and be the choir cheerleader who gets people to come. It's good that we get to focus on music within the church.

A week ago our car wouldn't start. We tried jumping and nothing happened, which is a really bad sign. AAA came with a tow truck and got it started. Once I turned off the car, it wouldn't restart. They said it was a dead battery and that they could get a replacement one here and install it. I got a new battery and everything was fixed within two hours. I was so glad because I thought I would have to take it to a shop and we would be without a car for a day or two.

Last week we took a short bike ride to Andrew's old middle school. He showed me some old memories and it was a nice day for a ride. Photoshop is the new fixation for Andrew at this point. He is learning it very quickly and doing very nice work at that. We are now checking out some movies at the Library. It reminded me of when I would go as a kid and what a great place it is to learn.

Since Debbie went out of town we spent the night at her house and watched a suspense film from the 60's.

Saturday night was a GIRL'S NITE OUT!!! Woopee, Yip, Yip, Hooray! (This is all in great sarcasm.) Don't get me wrong, I love my friends but I don't need a girl's nite because I still really like my husband too much. I got to catch up with Shanda and eat junk food, plus a movie. I was so happy to be with Shanda again. I am bummed that I can't be at her wedding since I will be in Atlanta. I really want to be at a temple sealing of a close friend.

Last week we ate Hot Pot at Drew and Cassi's with their Chinese speaking friends. It was authentic Chinese food that tasted nothing like American Chinese food. It is much more tasteless food that has spicy broth added. We also ate legit Mexican at their house for Cinqo de Mayo.

Andrew and I gave talks for Mother's Day, Andrew's 4th time actually. I spoke about about the fear of many girl's at this stage in their life. Will I be a good mom and how can I prepare now? Andrew had some great things to share about repairing your relationship with your mom if it is broken and why that relationship needs to be healthy.

Last night we visited Debra Lowe's family at the home she was raised in. That was fun to see a bit of the world she came from in Lehi.

Adobe Creative Suite You Shall Be Well Used

Thursday April 22- Last week I had a crepe get together with the Switzerland girls and attended the ward party. A girl in the ward asked why my husband dresses up like a pirate and I was very amused. We bought lots of software for our new computer (Office, Adobe Creative Suite, Final Cut.) It is also decked out with a new hot computer case.

We had a date night where I got a tutorial about the Beatles by listening to some records and watching the movie "Help!" Andrew is teaching me about the real geniuses of music.

We saw the show that Mer's choir is touring with and hungout with her after. She is now an Arts and Visual Communications major and wants to go into Graphic Design. The sun is out and we are taking advantage of it. I love a tan husband and he loves a freckly wife, hence the URL of this blog.

Andrew is deeply considering his options for majors and hopefully he will get some inspiration and insight that will point him in the right direction. He had a rough night a couple of days ago and he is so much more happy and on top of things since that release of fears and troubles. He is trying to focus more on working out, figuring out his major for life, and not messing up in life (which are big things for all of us.) It is so hard to watch the person I love have such low self-esteem and become so overwhelmed by the fact that he is not his ideal self. Life can be rough. I am trying to be so supportive and help him feel and be more successful so that he can see how cool he is and I can show him how happy he makes me. He is so capable and Satan loves pointing out our weaknesses and flaunting them. My husband is os awesome, he just makes mistakes and, as everyone does, gets in a rut that drags him down sometimes. All I can do in those moments is hold him down and show him that I am always there and will always love him.

Acting On Conference

Wednesday April 14- Tax deadlines kinda snuck up on us new adults. How can the government expect us to do something that no one has ever taught us how to do. If a whole profession was invented to do taxes then we darn well should not be required to participate in this. Poop on them.

Last week we watched "La Vita E Bella" and the little boy in it was so adorable. I had an overwhelming urge to make a baby right then and my husband was grateful. He will remember that this is what happens when he shows me movies with adorable kid main characters. Saturday night I hung out with Mer and heard more about her dramatic life. She needs to stop kissing boys and wait for real love. Not my place but still. We watched the newest Madea movie with Andrew and loved it. Sunday was interesting because our ward got smaller and we meet at 2:30 pm. We can take our time to get ready but it is already dinner time when we get home. I felt like everyone was more friendly, happier, and willing to make friends now that most of the people with babies are out and getting to know people is more manageable. We have a new bishop and his wife is pretty entertaining. Spring has come upon us and life is sunnier and more cheerful! I rented "Where The Wild Things Are" and we watched it. Andrew's new saying is "Imagination is an endangered species." He is sad that we cannot all be like we were when we were kids. He even started writing a creative story about it. It's tender. We received our new MacBook and Andrew is not addicted, he just NEEDS it. He redid a couple of songs on Garageband and they sound awesome. Actually, it reminds me a lot of the beginning of our relationship when he would do that a lot. He is so talented.

I was proud of myself for recently acting on a prompting I received during Conference, to tell a friend that by not being active in church she was missing out on blessings that God wants to give her. I called Brit Kanter and had a good discussion that ended up with my testimony. I told her that God is always there for her and is the answer to her confusion about what to do in life. There is only so far we can go until we need some extra help from Him. She really appreciated it even though it is awkward to voice a strong opinion to someone who does not feel quite the same. I did not care though because the gospel is too important to let it go untold because of fear. I don't think I would have been as bold a couple of years ago. Maybe because I relied too much on keeping friends. Now I have Andrew and I do not fear being rejected by friends. I think reading Andrew's mission e-mails influenced me to act (plus Conference). It made me happy to share my testimony with someone I love.

Easter/Birthday/ Conference Weekend with Family

Friday April 9- My birthday was so great. Andrew wrapped a pretty orange bracelet as the present at the end of my bed. Then he welcomed me to my real birthday as he tore down the sheet that hid all of my real presents. He had lots of new spring clothing displayed ready for me to do a fashion show. We played my life size Barbie and I tried on the shirts, shoes, necklaces, and skirts. It was so cool to have a husband to wake up to on my first married birthday, 22! We exchanged some shirts and shopped more that night. We got our wedding photos up in a nice collage with other photos so that the apt was all done up how we wanted when my parents came. They stayed for about 4 days during Conference weekend. I took mom to a crepe party at Jes's (who is now engaged to Kirby!) My parents and I had a good conversation about what I am studying and I liked showing them what I am learning. We showed them the apt and had a talk about what Andrew wants to do for a career. It is a lot of pressure to find the right job that uses your talents, you enjoy, and can earn enough money for the lifestyle you want. Andrew is trying to decide between Graphic Design and Pyschologist. I am not attracted to the graduate work with the latter and when you get down to it, art is what Andrew loves and is really talented at. If only God would tell us, but it looks like he has to work a bit harder for the answer. If I had to support a family, I don't think teaching would cut it. We celebrated my birthday at Pirate Island. The kids played at the arcade and my family got to see the cool place Andrew works at. We swam at the hot tub of the hotel with Josh's family and Andrew threw the kids around in the pool. We watched every session of Conference and all attended the Saturday afternoon one where Meredith sang with her choir. I wore bright Easter colors from my new wardrobe. The boys stayed for priesthood session while we had Vivi's bridal shower at CPK. I saw Katherine for a bit. We had an Easter egg hunt in Debbie's backyard and the Easter Bunny left some money in the eggs. Woohoo! We played Balderdash that evening and it was nice to be around family even thought there were some annoying parts. It was wonderful that Mom organized all of this stuff.

Running Moab

Sunday March 28- Last Friday Andrew's family and I set off on an adventure to Moab. We drove altogether in the van and discussed Q-Tip hairstyles and various other topics that got people involved and laughing. It was enjoyable to finally eat out and sleep at Debbie's friends home. We slept in a nice camper without heat. We registered the night before and Erin acted like Jenny so that I could take her place since she moved to Oregon. We got everything in place like getting the chip attached to our shoe. We set off the next morning wearing our Beck Family Run t-shirts that Erin and Andrew designed. The buses took us up the canyon and Debbie, Nicole and I mostly walked the 5 miles back. We made it in 1 hour and 15 minutes. There was good food and picture taking while we waited for the half marathoners to arrive. They arrived after 2 hours and 23 minutes of running. We al felt so accomplished but I wish I could have at least broken a sweat. I liked being with a family that was not my original family and see everyone's personalities and the dynamics.

We went to Grandma and Daddo's for dinner and we brought yummy grits. Andrew finished his training and we skated at the ward activity and dressed 80s. Wednesday I had my OPI with Mme. Thompson and was told that I am at an Advanced Low Plus level. Two years ago I was Adv. Low. She said I mostly spoke at an Adv. Medium level but had trouble talking about abstract things that I already talk about in a choppy confusing way in english. I do not do politics or current events, yet I have to be able to talk about them in French? It was very frustrating that the things I can't even talk about in english were what was keeping me from moving up. Anyway, Andrew and I watched Pirates of the Caribbean, spray painted some new home decor and made a yummy dinner from scratch. We went to the Holi Festival with Mer and ate dinner and ice cream with her. It was really fun and colorful!

The Domestic Becks

Wednesday March 17- Saturday night we got caught up on Grey's Anatomy and Sunday we visited our newly engaged friend Janae as well as Stacie and Seth. Last night we saw DJ's comedy troupe and were very entertained by their stand up. We met Meredith's then "boyfriend" on their way back from their spring break in St. George/Las Vegas. We really liked him but Meredith needs someone more outgoing and musical. We met greeted them at our front door wit our most domestic apparel and appearances possible. I was wearing a cute apron holding a plate of smoked salmon and brie on a slices of baguette and in the other hand was a baked apple pie. Andrew was sitting on the sofa with his glasses reading the dictionary and sipping from a mug with his feet on the coffee table. We had to make a good first impression. You never know when Meredith will introduce us to our future brother in-law. Andrew and I are now reading the 3rd book in the Twilight series, Eclipse. Andrew could not wait for the movie in June before he found out what happens. The third was my favorite so I am excited to re-read it with him this time. I like having something we can both do together that is outside of the ordinary and specific to us. The above picture is us in our real vampire states.

New Goals

Saturday March 13- I want so badly to be the wife that Andrew needs. To show my love for him in the exact way he needs it and when he needs it. As we all know, Ashley needs to express her feelings verbally more often and express happiness through her face and actions. I am happy so often but i'm sad to see that Andrew can't understand i'm happy unless I show him and tell him. Why do I keep things to myself even if I really don't want to? Believe me, I have gotten better in the past couple of years but I have to remember that Andrew cannot read my mind and he wants to know everything I think. Recently since marriage, life has had some adjustments and my mind takes responsibility really seriously. It is kind of weighed down with achieving tasks and finishing lists. The thing that I have realized lately is that the lists will never be finished because there are always new things to add. I remember and dwell on things too much and I need to put these things aside and deal with them when they really need to be dealt with. I guess i'm a worrier.

My biggest changes starting now are : 1). find joy and happiness all the time in my life, especially through trials. Enduring to the end also means keeping a positive view. That is part of the test. 2). When I am happy, show it! 3). Remember always the Goddess I will become and the perfection that I will possess. I have been overcome with feelings of failure and I must remember that I am proving myself to my father, so accept that I make mistakes and prove my real self to the Father. Focus on the important things to excel at: my eternal nature, spirit and eternal marriage to my husband. Cherish him, meet his needs, and have fun! 4). I am now promising to read the scriptures everyday and pray (individually and with Andrew). This has been periodic and I know that the lack of doing that deprives me of a spiritual lift everyday. I need the reminder that God is over all and watches over me. Christ has suffered my pain and desires my upmost happiness. It has been easy to forget to do that because of scheduling issues, schoolwork, fatigue and marriage adjustments, but those are no excuses for not doing the most important things of the day. I know there have been times when I have not been able to concentrate on spiritual things because my relationship with Andrew has been off (which is probably because of a lack of gospel intuneness). I have noticed how Satan has created conflict around us many times before we go to church, before the temple, and even about how to pay tithing. He has made my heart troubled by our relationship at times when we really need to be able to focus on spiritual blessings we are trying to obtain.

I am recommitting myself to these 4 goals because I need to change to be more content with how I am living my life. I am in control of my life, my feelings, my actions, and my salvation. I am putting my real priorities first and everything else will fall into place. More trials will always be coming and these aspects of life must always be solid throughout every stage of life. I pray that the Lord will help me be the person I want to be. That woman who's divine self will be a perfect spirit after this life.

Letters Home

Sunday, March 7, 2010- This last week we (well I guess it was mostly me) finished a really cool project. I compiled all of Andrew's e-mails home from his mission and made a legit book out of them. I love reading about those 2 unique years that he can't really explain and which strongly affected him and changed him into who he is today. He is such an entertaining and eloquent writer (not like me at all). He is really funny. This book will be a memory that we can show our children in preparation for and after a mission. It may even help Andrew if he becomes a mission president someday. He loves the book so much. It is honestly super awesome and pro. I am back on birth control. Hallelujah! That was an interesting experiment (I even thought I was pregnant after missing my period this month. Atleast I still believe i'm not pregnant since the all knowing/ very tempermental pregnancy test told me I wasn't). Wait a second, I had just eaten carrots after a half moon on a Wednesday night after 7:35. It was all for nothing. Andrew got paid from a mindcloud client so that was a great payoff for him and helped him see that he can get results from his hard work. He is learning so much. We spent time with Jenny's family before they moved to Oregon. We saw Jeff and Nicole's family a couple of times and ate dinner with them. I'm glad we have kids to play with sometimes. We switched Andrew over to my family's Verizon plan and got new phones. I had not had a new one for 3 years! We received our wedding video and it is a really precious memory for everyone. I'm glad we decided to have it done.

I had a really sweet experience yesterday. I was doing laundry and had loaded my three washing machines when a mentally challenged man went ahead and anxiously put in the 75 cents to run one of the machines. He hopped away with extreme delight on his face as he exclaimed "I got to help someone today!" I thanked him and was touched by his kindness. He told me he had to leave and get a drink after which I pointed to the vending machine and told him he could get a drink from it. He only had 25 cents so I told him I could help him with the rest. It was so nice to be reminded of the importance of service daily and I was glad that I was able to help this pure child of God in return. I was so touched by everything and was reminded that I am blessed with the opportunity to serve Andrew everyday, whereas this man had to search for service (how noble of him).

Dating For A Year

Sunday, February 21, 2010- Two weeks ago we had a girls night with Lydia, Cassi, Haleigh, and Meghan. We were all in our PJs, ate junk food, swapped recipes, shared life stories, painted nails, and talked girl stuff/married women stuff how a real girl party is supposed to go. We had Debra over for dinner that weekend and it was fun to hear about her fun experiences with Andrew in the past. They have been creating together for a while. Andrew and I had our first year anniversary of dating on the 12th and we celebrated Valentine's Day with it by going to the Chef's Table and watching Fantastic Mr. Fox. That film is done by Wes Anderson who is one of Andrew's favorite directors. I wrote Andrew a sweet Valentine's note with a great inside joke on it. Our ward had a "how well do you know your spouse" game for Valentines. Andrew and I shocked the ward by agreeing that sex was my favorite hobby. It was akward slash fantastic. We did some temple sealings and I really enjoyed my first experience with that. On the real V-day we drove to different places in our past relationship and reinacted some stuff. We went to the hill, the HFAC, the campus hill, Kiwanis park, the church where we played soccer last V-day and then watched a romantic movie with Debbie. We didn't have school on Monday and decided to eat sushi with Shanti. Andrew has band practice once in a while. Sometimes we plan on going to the gym 3 times a week and decide to cuddle while we let dinner digest, and then have sex instead. It's hard getting to the gym when you can do that instead. We saw Meredith perform "Listen" at her institute talent show and she was amazing as usual. We hung out with Andrew's family at his cousin's junior high performance of "Joseph and the Technicolor Dreamcoat." We saw "The Princess and The Frog" and it was great. Disney animated movies was back on the saddle. This past week has been really good since I am trying hard to treat Andrew like he deserves. I can't wait to go back on birth control so that I am not always worrying about getting pregnant. My mom had surgery this week and is recovering well.

Kidney Infections Are Quite Unpleasant

Friday, February 5, 2010- Last Monday we got health insurance and we have used it well. After our doctor's appt where I decided to go off of hormonal birth control as an experiment, we spent the night at Debbie's and spent time with the Beck children. We had dinner and went to DI. It was fun to sleep together in the house that he grew up in now that we are married. We ate pancakes for breakfast and that night we saw a french film. We are lined up to see lots of films at the International Cinema this semester. We went to a missionary homecoming of Andrew's high school friend Camren. I was able to take part in hearing my cousin Viviana's patriarchal blessing. Mom is having some major surgeries because she has a cyst on her ovary, a bowel blockage and other problems. She said that this blockage has been the cause of many of her mysterious sicknesses through the years since Meredith's birth. She has been going through so many medical things. I pray she will be protected and now I can put her name on the temple prayer roll since I am endowed. We hung out with Meredith and watched an old movie from our past. For FHE we finally put my contract on craigslist , which should have been done a long time ago. Lesson learned. We found a buyer the next day but she won't move in until March, better than nothing though. What a blessing. We created magnets for FHE by cutting pictures out of the newspaper or magazines and gluing them on the bottom of these clear, decorative rocks. They are so great, especially the pictures of the bearded men from the 1800's.

I woke up Thursday morning with back pain. I thought it was from my heavy backpack. I pushed through the pain and some nausea that morning because I had to go to class.We met up with Gma and Daddo, Debbie, and Mckay and Laree's family to eat at the Cannon Center before we went to Aurora's play Tartuffe. It was the funniest play ever invented. Period. The acting was superb and very well overdone for this farce. Today I woke up with the same nausea and pain and I decided that I couldn't go to school. By 4pm I decided that I needed to go to the Urgent Care Facility because I had a self diagnosed kidney infection. I had lower back pain, abdominal pain, head aches, frequent urination, and vomiting. Debbie took me and they put me on an IV for antibiotics and dehydration. They said I was really sick and should have acted on this when I realized I was peeing like crazy. I mean I uncontrollably peed my pants on Sunday. That should have been a clear indication that something was wrong. It was dumb of me to wait until this happened but I am doing so much better. This is frequent in young married women because sex is just such a new experience for their bodies. We have never been to the doctor this much in our single lives. I hadn't seen Andrew since this morning and I couldn't get a hold of him because his phone died. I am so glad that Debbie was available to take care of me. Andrew knew I was sick and didn't check up on his sick wife until he came home at 9pm. I was a bit disappointed and wanted him to have a better reason than having a dead phone. I missed him and wanted to share my crazy problems from the day with him. I wanted him to hold me and tell me that he will take care of me as I layed alone in bed waiting for him. When he got home he explained that he thought we needed time apart since he felt we were taking each other for granted and things had been wierd between us. It was all very coincidental that things worked out the way they did, but I learned about how much I want to share everything with Andrew and was reminded of the frequent theme of treating each other like royalty.

Mindcloud Media

Saturday, January 23, 2010- Andrew has been getting some serious sinus headaches in the past couple of weeks that can get really painful. I hate seeing him in pain and not being able to stop it. All I can do is hold him and put pressure on it. He got this white stuff on his tongue from the parasite antibiotics too. He has never had so many medical mysteries before marriage. This is pushing us to get insuranc, which we are working on. We recently found out that two of our friends are illegitimately pregnant and that has to be super scary for them. I have a husband and support and that would still be a scary event for me. Andrew and I recorded our song that we sang at our wedding called "This Is What It Feels Likes" so that it could dub our singing in our wedding video (we didn't do our best that night). Monday was MLK Jr. day and we went to the hot springs with the cousins.

Andrew has started a media business called Mindcloud Media and has been working on the website a lot. He already has clients! He is working with Debra and it will provide web design, music and all other cool talents he has. I am really excited that he can put his efforts toward something he enjoys to be able to make money. Sometimes he just tells me how much fun it is to create. It suits him way better than washing dishes. I am so impressed by his abilities and creativity. He's so cool. I just God helps him put his talents to use because he really is blessed with so many. This stuff he does is so complicated to me and it is neat to see that people have spent their growing up years differently. He acquired talents in his spare time while I learned from the television about the latest stupid thing that Britney Spears did. I was so lame compared to him. I love his curiousity and drive to create. I find that fascinating and admirable. I rely on people like Andrew to make the cool stuff for me. I have become more aware of the work that goes into art. I just love that he can get an idea in his head and make it come out through graphics or music. He is learning about networking plus starting and running a business. He is so capable and has real talent so it should come along nicely. How do we find jobs we like? I am glad that I will soon be a certified teacher and do what I am interested in. So many people have not found that and it takes work to find a job that satisfies you and really uses the skills you posess.

As i've said before, life is so great but never been more challenging for me. That's how we learn. We all have to go through the akward learning periods. Have I mentioned how much I love sleeping with my husband. I love waking up beside him in the middle of the night and knowing he is there for me to snuggle up closer to. It is so tender because sometimes we will both be awake and he will give me a peck on the neck or i'll put my arms around him and squeeze him closer. During this time, we are so relaxed and sleepy and wouldn't want to be with anyone else.

So Real Married Life, Hein?

January 16, 2010- I got married to my best friend who I get to see all the time. Time is a great adjustment we have had to make. I love waking up in his arms, cooking dinner with him (since he changed to the morning shift), putting on my makeup while he pees, cleaning the apartment that we both dirtied and no one else, getting dressed together, getting undressed together, ya know, all the good parts of the day.

We got back to our apartment in Provo which was ours and nobody else's. That means no one is ever going to walk in uninvited and catch us making out and we don't have to clean up somebody's mess that isn't ours. We had our own belated Christmas since we spent ours in Mexico. We made a nice breakfast, watched "A Muppet Christmas Carol" and then opened all of our Wedding gifts. We got money and some helpful things like a tool kit and decorations and kitchen stuff. We spent that whole week before school started doing setop things. We shopped for furniture at this amazing store called IKEA where things are cheaper but you have to assemble them yourself. Andrew was the one who had an idea for a color scheme and he was so excited to decorate. We chose red, white, and black with a modern style. We bought a sofa with pillows, coffee table, kitchen table with red chairs, a red side table, cool lamps, a nightstand, and crazy curtains. We hung up a big picture of Christ and also the temple. We had a house warming party with some cousins and Meredith. I had to go through lots of name changing stuff and still am. It is going to take a while to get used to saying Ashley Beck instead of Rodgers. I love that I use Beck now because it links Andrew and I together when people see it. Andrew got a horrible parasite that caused him to have terrible cramping and diarrhea for like 5 days straight, but he got better eventually. That's when Ashley and Andrew learned that health insurance is necessary. BIG MISTAKE! But making mistakes together is what this learning process is about, and believe me we are learning everyday. We are having to grow up. We need to get car insurance, health insurace, pay rent, utilities and buy things all the time plus we need to balance school, work, scripture study, prayer, FHE church callings, temple attendance, and time for only each other. It is all great stuff but can be challenging. I am not going to do all of this new stuff perfectly, which scares me and is really hard for me to get used to. I know that if we do what we are supposed to and keep our temple covenants to the fullest, we will be happy. Happiness does not mean that life will be easy though. A lot of times we get the most joy from getting through and learning from hard things. Nothing is more important than God and the man that I am sealed to forever. I love serving the person I care about more than anything. God has already blessed us with so much. His mercies are incredible.

Our Honeymoon

December 28, 2009- We spent a couple of nights in the unique room of the Penthouse Suite at the Hines Mansion in Provo. There was a big jacuzzi, lots of room, big bed, fridge, and beautiful decor. It was very fun to say the least. We did take the sacrament the next day. Monday morning we went to the Lodge up in Aspen Grove where my family was staying. My siblings and I went and got massages at the Sundance Spa and then ate lunch together. Andrew stayed and played in the snow with the kids and others. We had a little gift exchange at our Seafood Fest dinner and then went home to pack for our real Honeymoon. We left for Puerto Vallarta, Mexico from Tuesday to Sunday. We arrived in the Airport and were bombarded with people trying to sell us stuff and get us to buy timeshares, etc. The city was full of tourism. I loved getting into our big, nice, room at the Friendly Hola Resort and having total silence and no agenda. We only had to do what we wanted, when we wanted to do it. There was free food all day, any time, a gorgeous view of the beach from our window, and dancing music all the time. We ate dinner on the beach and watched a traditional hispanic dancing show. The staff was so nice and this resort was a great cultural experience as opposed to the American ritzy ones who play jazz music and have hardly any native speakers anywhere. We layed out which was so nice seeing as how we had come from snowy Utah just the day before. Andrew got real tan and Hott!There was a nice restaurant that we could dress up for and eat at and yet we could be in our swimsuit all day if we wanted. It was wonderful! We walked around a bit and went on an excursion that was way too long, but the most fun part was being with Andrew and enjoying the moments. We found the LDS church in the middle of the city in a ghetto with brightly painted homes boasting their Catholic statues off of cobblestone streets with chickens running across them. It was an adventurous adventure in adventureland. Andrew brought his guitar and serenaded me, even played a little bit of traditional Mexican music. Did we get fat on this trip full of free food? Not necessarily fat, but we did not fully hold back. We kept on ordering Shirley Temples and this one waiter was shocked that we weren't taking advantage of the free alcoholic beverages. We ate with a Canadian family a couple of times and a shark bit Andrew's wiener, Grandma. I feel that it is necessary to get away from your city of residence for a honeymoon so that your mind can stay completely away from any residue of responsibility and habits. Mexico was so gorgeous and an absolute blast thanks to our good friend Debra Lowe. Sadly, Ashley's camera was not being good and didn't work. Do not worry for it is in time out and thinking hard about what it did. So no pictures were taken and I fail as a photographer. From now on Andrew takes the family photos. Thanks to the internet, we can put generic pictures up of the view from our room and part of what the room looked like, plus this cool sand stamp they would do everyday.

December 19th in the year of Extreme Excitement

Ashley & Andrew Wedding from Brad Winegar on Vimeo.

December 23, 2009- WE GOT MARRIED!!! And I managed to drag myself out of the bed and write in my journal. I feel that deserves an applause. Thank you.
I first wanted to talk about my endowment day. It was such a magnificent day. After some last minute errands and a quick dance final, Andrew and I drove to the Mount Timpanogas temple with great anticipation. Receiving the endowment was unlike any experience I had ever had before. My whole family, minus Meredith, was there dressed in white and there to support ME. Being in the house of the Lord with them was so overwhelming because it was like we were all in heaven together as it will be some day. It was so incredible that I couldn't keep back the tears. I was able to sit with Andrew in the gorgeous Celestial Room and think about how we will be together forever after making such strong covenants with God. I felt closer to him there. I now wear garments and they are not wierd at all. I love knowing that I am being protected and being able to remember my covenants. After leaving the temple, we met up with all the kids at a hotel and I saw Pam, Brit, Katie Hensley and Katie Nolan. They were so sweet to be there for me. We had a wonderful Groom's Dinner at the Provo Library. Debbie did a great job of organizing it and bringing the families together. We introduced everyone and it was a very enjoyable bonding time. That night I had to get all the performing songs for the reception on the Ipod and then made my way to the lodge. It was decorated for the season with lights and bells and plants plus it was so fun to have everyone living together. Andrew was taken hostage and had one of the most crazy and fun Bachelor parties ever experienced, complete with manly assignments and man hair prizes. I had my last night as a single woman in my own bedroom.
I woke up on my wedding day and it was pretty surreal for a while. The whole time I was getting ready I just couldn't believe it was finally here. The girls pampered me with makeup, hair, nails, pedicure, and lotion. I looked gorgeous and everyone wanted to help me. We ate a yummy breakfast or grits and pancakes.
We went to the temple and slowly went through the amazing process of a temple marriage. We got time together before we went into the sealing room and we were able to hold each other and think about what we were about to do. I couldn't keep from crying during the ceremony. It was so incredible to be able to feel Chet's presence during the whole thing. It was the most beautiful ceremony and the culmination of everything I have worked for in my life. I was able to be sealed to my best friend under the authority of God and make beautiful covenants with God concerning my sacred relationship with Andrew. I now feel a closeness with him unlike before. I loved him and was committed to him but now that I have made these covenants I have a deeper commitment to making him the happiest man on earth. I want to do all I can for this marriage. We came out of the temple all dressed up, Andrew in his tux and me in my dress with my bouquet. In the dressing room I had to cover up the mess that my tears caused since we were going to be taking tons of pictures. The videographer and Katherine took some great shots and we had so much fun, even though it was pretty cold.
We had the reception and saw so many people we love. It was really fun because we actually did entertaining things. People from our families were able to share their feelings about us and we sang our song, cut the cake, had live singing to our first dance and others, and threw the bouquet. It was just what we wanted. People were there to love us, make us cry with happiness and celebrate this union. Our car was decked out nicely with things like "You can do it!" and "Baby in 9 months!" It was nice to drive off and know that from then on it was about just me and Andrew. After we left, we were tired from the emotional highs and long day. We went to the Hines Mansion down the street and got into the Penthouse suite. I loved that Andrew wanted to say our first prayer together as husband and wife. He was so overwhelmed and happy. It turned out to be a plea with God to help us be so united and stay close to him and halp us in all aspects of our marriage to be what he wants us to be. He was so sincere and sensitive. I can't really explain it but it was the most tender thing I had ever seen. I love my husband from the bottom of my soul.

The Last Week

December 16, 2009-My Bridal Shower was so fun. We ate at California Pizza Kitchen and a lot of my favorite girls in Utah were there. I got so much lingerie and opened it in the middle of the restaurant. I got some interesting looks and even a thumbs up.
We got our mattress and bed set up. Debbie gave us a nice dresser and a beautiful wooden 4 post bed. We visited with cousin Mandy and she fed us good food while we watched Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer claymation. We played music and sang and had so much goodness fun. It snowed like crazy and now it is a winter wonderland. We went to Jeff and Nicole's on Monday to celebrate Debbie's birthday.
Mom got into town and we went shopping for things for the apartment like wonderful pillows, gorgeous purple bed sheets, towels, shower liner, rug and more. She is being helpful but sometimes too much for me. We had a lovely ward Christams party at Aspen Grove and I got excited about the family staying up there during the wedding.
Friday night we went to Andrew's and looked at old yearbooks from high school and played some old school SuperMario. Afterwards we went to the jacuzzi at Glenwood. We had to do some fancy spy work so we weren't spotted by mom in the Cambridge Court parking lot (she is staying in our apartment). It is freezing and the hot tub felt so nice. We spent Saturday evening with Debra Lowe just talking and playing a board game. She is so kind and loves us.
I got my bridals back and they are gorgeous. I had to choose three, without Andrew's opinion, to put up at the reception. We framed the bridals and engagements for the reception (which are going in our apt later) and I think I chose well. We had our interviews for doing our last ever living ordinances. This weekend will be so spiritually amazing! All these ordinances within 24 hours!
We got our marriage license and we have been working hard on the song we will sing for our reception. His talent with music and song writing bewilders me. It is beautiful and we pretty much are going to have put it together in a week. We only have to say goodnight and go our seperate ways for only 3 more nights. This weekend we need to remember to stay connected while so many people we love are vying for our attention. This is the most exciting time of my life!!It is so close and we never thought it would come. So much preparation has gone into this and it has finally come.